Getting Complete

Stepping out of alignment to get into greater alignment

If you’ve been following my writing, I think you know by now that alignment is what I’m going for.

Syncing up my values and choices so that my external world can be a beautiful reflection of this.

So when I decided to book a trip to Chicago to go to a Bears playoff game last week, it didn’t necessarily line up with my direction.

I’ve been a massive Bears fan my whole life and although I’ve detached from sports recently, this Bears team had something special that drew me in.

They had a miracle season where they we’re winning games in the most improbable ways. As a lifelong fan, I told myself there is something special happening here and I want to be apart of the energy and catch the wave.

So on a whim, I booked a trip with my partner thinking it would be a fun excuse to go on a mini adventure and have a new experience.

We caught a Dead cover band Friday night at an epic new live music venue, Garcia’s (owned by the Jerry Garcia estate). After Bob Weir passed away last weekend, this felt like an appropriate way to celebrate his life.

It was indeed, a beautiful experience.

The game was fun. We had minus weather, swirling snow and a fan base going crazy. We got an improbable moment where you saw something that made your jaw drop.

As far as an experience goes, it was uniquely memorable.

But, ultimately I couldn’t shake the feeling that there is a lack of alignment in me being in Chicago spending valuable time and money on an entertainment-based experience.

Again, there is nothing wrong with entertainment and having fun at a game. I actually think it’s a healthy outlet for our society compared to many others.

But, for me it’s just no longer lined up with my direction.

I’m committed to making choices that feed my vitality.

Being of service, connecting deeply with others, doing impactful work, growing, choosing my health > comfort.

And on this journey of stepping into greater alignment, I hadn’t fully landed on where sports and entertainment fit in.

Do I value it yet? Yes, to a certain degree.

It gives me a point of connection with people and a temporary outlet to detach from the pressures of life.

So although I felt a yes in my body to go on this adventure, the interpretation was a bit misguided.

My body was craving adventure. Adventure within. I got that message at the Dead show and I know exactly where I want to put my energy now.

A commitment to making the courageous choice of following my truth with my career, how I build community and how I show up in relationships.

Honoring my adventurous side – not by overindulging in entertainment-based experiences, but by living as truthfully as I can.

Producing value instead of seeking it.

I wrote about this when the Jays lost the world series. That sports can become problematic when it distracts you from playing your own game.

So going to this game when I know there are other things more valuable worth investing in, may seem out of integrity.

But my Bears journey has been in the making for over 25 years. It was bigger than sports. It was about getting closure after spending years investing in something that became a big part of my identity.

I think it would be trivial to say that’s a waste of time. I got to develop a relationship with a new city. I got inspired by players that changed the way I view my own potential. I got to bond with my cousin over our fandom.

And now I feel complete. I saw one of the most exciting games in Bears history. I got the euphoric moment I had been desperately seeking as a kid.

And I learned a valuable lesson - this is not going to give me the fulfillment that I’m seeking.

I felt the misalignment right when I landed. And my partner did too.

And it was honestly a fantastic exercise on how to align yourself when you’re in the wrong place.

We practiced on having a good attitude the whole weekend. Staying open to an awesome experience even though we we’re freezing our butts off.

We bonded with new friends and practiced staying positive when the Bears we’re blowing the game.

We deepened our alignment by going on a misaligned adventure together.

And for me that was worthwhile.

Growth is not linear.

As you evolve and commit deeper to your values, it’s sometimes valuable to dip your toe back into your old self.

Does this still fit? If it doesn’t, you can simply move on and have peace in your heart.

Now I have a deep knowing now that the entertainment I desire must come from within. If I’m relying on others to make me fill a void, I am avoiding something in my life.

That’s valuable information.

Football. Mindless entertainment. Fancy dinners. City trips. I am no longer lined up with these societal forms.

I am lined up with staying in motion. Facing myself and doing the movement that is most in integrity with my direction.

That is where the real entertainment lies.